1. Jump it off something
2. Put foot pegs on the back and give a friend a ride
3. Ride to a bar with a friend to get a beer
4. Ride to another bar with a friend to get another beer
5. Stop riding it to bars before you’ve had too many beers, and/or ride it somewhere with a friend to get a taco
6. Tell your friend about how much you love it because a few specific things like mustache bars or specific geometry or the amount of travel in the fork or the wheel diameter and at the end of your short speech, say, “Do you want to ride it? You should, it’s awesome. Go ahead.”
7. Clear your head
8. Enjoy going fast
9. Enjoy going slow
10. Ride it up hills and enjoy the pain it causes because you are getting strong or because you are imagining the giant cheeseburger you’re going to eat afterward or because it feels good to feel something after sitting at a desk all day or because it helps you forget about your breakup or your bank account or whatever
11. Drink a whole shitload of coffee and ride down hills in the dark
12. “Ride it off a ramp into a large body of water” —Chris Reichel
13. Do a wheelie
14. Ride it to your local bike shop, hang out and talk to other customers and mechanics about how much you all love bikes
15. Ride it to work and practice saying “wheeeee” on your commute instead of “goddammit, I hate traffic”
16. Put a small stereo on it and rock out
17. Put a large stereo on it and rock out
18. Strap all your stuff to it and ride it across the country
19. Strap all your stuff to it and ride it across the state
20. Strap all your stuff to it and ride to the nearest campground
21. Ride it to a skate park and try to do some cool shit with it
22. Or just watch the skate park kids do some cool shit
23. Find a mountain bike trail described as “swoopy” and ride it
24. Find a mountain bike trail described as “technical” and try to ride it; possibly secretly enjoy picking scabs all next week
25. Ride with a whole bunch of people, which is either a parade or a gang, depending on your aggressiveness and how many small children are riding with you
26. Put on a bunch of fancy aerodynamic clothing and ride the hell out of your bike until you’re really tired
27. Don’t put on a bunch of fancy aerodynamic clothing but ride the hell out of your bike until you’re really tired
28. Ride with no hands
29. Ride with no clothes on
30. Ride it somewhere practical like the grocery store or coffee shop and enjoy not having to park a car when you get there
31. Try a new thing (wider bars, single speed, different wheel diameter size, fully rigid, full suspension, fatbike, fixie) and realize THIS is what you’ve been waiting for your whole life, holy shit, let me tell you, seriously
32. Ride it somewhere without calling it a “workout,” using Strava, or a heart-rate monitor
33. Or do all that stuff, you know, whatever your thing is
34. Unclip your foot from your SPDs well before you stop so you don’t eat shit at a stoplight
35. Have a good idea while pedaling and thinking about nothing in particular
36. Enjoy the 360-degree view you have while riding, and congratulate yourself on saving thousands of dollars by not buying a convertible to get that same view
37. Get on it right now (or in an hour, or after work) and ride it instead of wishing you were riding it
-Brendan
[photo by Julie Cornelius/ Instagram @juliebike]
one day, while commuting to work in Cambridge, MA (on a bike) I was passed by this guy: https://vimeo.com/61440630 at least, I think it was this guy. It might have been a different guy, because I seem to remember he had a boom-box strapped to the back of his bike, playing some backup melody, and he didn’t have a cymbal.
Anyway: this list, while awesome, is only the start. If you’re a musician with incredible bike handling skills, you can blow the minds of fellow commuters everywhere.
38. Join your wife on a trail ride while she rides the family horse. Let the horse sniff out your bike first, though. And bring a few carrots.
Ride it while your dog gets a good run.
Ride it up a steep hill til your legs burn.
Lose the SPD’s install some flat pedals and ride in your Chacos. Your feet will enjoy the freedom and you’ll get that cool ass “Z” tan line.
Wrap socks around the pedals and tape them on so you can ride around barefoot.
Put a crazy bright light on the front so you can ride around at night and see everything.
Put horns, bells, honkers so you can make silly noises when you see other people on bikes and they can respond!
Ben – I am totally going to wrap socks on my pedals. Thank you.
Great list; bicycles are fairly awesome!